What is Self-Talk? Whether you realize it or not, you are always speaking to yourself internally. Self-talk is that inner voice that narrates your life, your views, and your experiences. Your inner dialogue influences not only how you view yourself, but also the world and people around you. Negative self-talk can damage your confidence, mental stability, and relationships. Incorporating a healthy and positive self-talk practice can help shift your perspective and influence practical and helpful problem-solving skills to inspire a more fulfilling life. If you are ready to practice loving yourself more and become your own personal champion, keep reading for tips on how to incorporate positive self-talk into your own life.
Identify Your Negative Self-Talk Sometimes we are not even aware of the negative thoughts that pass through our minds until we start feeling bad. Before anything, it is important to get familiar with the type of self-talk you demonstrate daily and your triggers. Are you polarizing situations? Catastrophizing? Magnifying negative aspects? Or personalizing situations by blaming yourself for everything? Becoming more aware of your inner dialogue will allow you to pinpoint which situations cause anxiety and stress which leads to self-doubt and negative self-talk. These triggers can stem from many things like work, a difficult relationship, or any other stressful or uncomfortable situation. Check-in with yourself regularly throughout the day to evaluate which direction your self-talk is heading into-positive and encouraging or negative and critical. Try checking in with yourself each hour to evaluate your feelings and what thoughts go along with those feelings. This helps you to become hyper-aware of the inner dialogue that you carry regularly. Is it more positive or negative?
Flip Them & Create Positive Affirmations Once you have identified the areas that your negative self-talk is most powerful and how they hold you back, you hold the power to dismantle those false beliefs. To do this, simply take the negative self-talk and flip it, reframing them into something positive and uplifting. So if you notice that whenever it’s time to do something challenging, you start to experience anxious and doubtful thoughts like “this is too much, I will never succeed”, you can instead tune in a positive affirmation to tune out the negative thought. Read below for more examples of positive self-talk that tune out negative self-talk
Negative statement: I can’t believe I did that, I just made a fool of myself.
Positive statement: Everyone makes mistakes, this is simply a learning moment and I will grow from it.
Negative statement: I have so much work to do, there’s not enough time, and I’ll never get it all done.
Positive statement: Even though I feel a bit overwhelmed, I can handle this. If I manage my time and do my best, that is all that matters.
Negative statement: I hate meeting new people, everyone will judge me. What if I make a fool of myself?
Positive statement: I am an amazing person with a lot to offer. It will be exciting to meet someone new and learn about one another.
Negative statement: I’ll never be good at this, I suck!
Positive statement: What strategies can I focus on to help me improve?
Practice, Practice, Practice! Your negative self-talk did not appear overnight which means that it will not disappear overnight. Changing your self-talk takes time and a lot of practice. Practice the flip method daily. Eventually, you will notice that your perspective around things that were once super challenging has changed. You will also notice yourself becoming a more positive and resilient person.